|(This article was first published on EFTfree.net)
The ability to help someone with fast and effective EFT usually takes both practice and a certain amount of trial and error. I learned this the hard way when I first started seeing clients in 2008. A man I will call Charles showed up for his first appointment hoping that we could address his recent weight gain, his bitterness toward his ex-wife, and an overwhelming amount of stress all in one session. Somehow, in our first phone conversation, I hadn’t realized that he was expecting “one-minute miracles” for three complicated areas of his life in our first session together! If I had known then what I know now, I would have avoided missteps like this early in my career. However, in addition to being more proactive in finding out what my clients’ expectations are, I have also learned that sometimes an enormous amount of healing can happen in one EFT session.
In the years since I began working as an EFT practitioner, I have identified five elements that have been present in every session I have done which contained a “one-minute wonder” or an issue that resolved itself in one session. When these elements are present, I find that my client and I are poised to work quickly toward the successful resolution of an issue.
Here are the five elements:
1. The session focuses on one issue at a time but it is thorough and uncovers each aspect of that one issue. An experienced practitioner will be able to differentiate between an issue that contains several different aspects, and a session that has lost its focus and started to wander. Sometimes my clients will suddenly remember a story that seems irrelevant on its surface, but when explored, turns out to contain the beginning of the issue that we are exploring. While it is important to be thorough with each aspect that presents itself, it is equally important to avoid slipping into chitchat, which can mask resistance, anxiety, or just a lack of focus.
2. The problem stands between my client and something that he or she really wants. I rarely see rapid change in clients who are not highly motivated by either their pain or their desire for pleasure. When clients are able to verbalize their reason for seeking EFT in the form of a positive goal, progress is usually faster. For instance, one client of mine was stuck in paralyzing grief over the loss of her mother. As we spoke, it became clear that what was driving her search for healing was the fact that her grief prevented her from being present for her three children the way she had been before her mom’s passing. Her desire to once again be a hands-on mother gave the entire session clarity and urgency, and within 90 minutes her grief had resolved for good.
3. The client wants to heal the problem more than he or she wants to be right. Part of the human condition appears to be our tendency to take fixed positions that make us feel righteous, but these positions can also handicap us when we are looking for creative solutions to a problem. Similarly, when we must deal with a person who will not give up a fixed position, we can quickly become deadlocked. Ultimately, healing happens because we really want to heal, not because we have the answer. Furthermore, until a difficult situation has been thoroughly explored from all angles, it is hard to know what is right, or skillful, and what isn’t. I have often said to my clients that the truth is like a multi-faceted diamond. Each facet reflects its own light and is integral to the beauty of the diamond. If a client is afraid to admit that her position might be wrong, at some point that fear must be addressed in the session.
4. There is an effective balance on the part of the client between self-direction and faith in the EFT Practitioner. It isn’t easy to trust someone you have just met with the most painful, frightening moments of your life; however, quick resolutions often require a certain amount of trust between people who have just met. I have noticed over time that one hallmark of a new client who is going to be able to move quickly through issues is that they trust me enough to try my suggestions, but they also maintain their own internal authority. They are the ones who will tell me if an affirmation just doesn’t land for them and suggest alternative wording to make it land better. Of course, it is easier to trust someone with whom you feel good chemistry, and the question of trust and chemistry has a “which came first, the chicken or the egg” feeling – good chemistry begets trust, and trust begets good chemistry, at least to some degree.
5. The client shares what is going through his/her mind, even when it seems irrelevant or random. The mind is a funny thing – one of its functions seems to be simply to secrete thoughts: sensible thoughts, strange thoughts, thoughts that, at first glance, seem irrelevant to the task at hand. The connections between our thoughts are not always immediately apparent, and, even more confusingly, sometimes thoughts truly are random. However, from the point of view of an EFT Practitioner, the thought that seems the strangest to our client may be the very thought that leads the way out of an issue. When clients are willing to let their Practitioner in on the thoughts running through their minds without giving in to the temptation to prejudge them, the Practitioner has a rich field of possibilities with which to work.
I have been blessed to work with willing and open clients who have allowed me to open my own mind to the immense power of EFT and its ability to provide gentle yet fast healing. I have learned over time that much more can be accomplished in a session than I had previously thought possible. Over the years, Charles in particular has become my inspiration. I love the fact that he believed so much was possible in such a short time. Perhaps he was the one who had the right attitude, simply because he was not focused on limitations.
As Gary Craig has said so often, we are on the ground floor of a healing high rise. These five steps to faster results with EFT are just one of many inroads that are being discovered every day.
Karen Brodie is a Certified EFT Practitioner in private practice in Los Angeles. She works primarily with clients who are struggling with unhealed trauma, although in the past she has worked successfully with a wide variety of issues. Connect with Karen at www.KarenLBrodie.com.
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